Subject: It could all be so simple, but you'd rather make it hard
Current Mood: Optimistic
Current Music: Lauryn Hill - Ex Factor

I woke up feeling sick so now I'm sitting at home, I think - actually, I know - that my mum will call my dad and tell him I'm acting up again. But I'm not. Really.

I don't feel sick anymore, but I feel inspired! I felt like making a new blog with my thoughts so I went to blogger.com and I remembered how I'd gone there before and looked at a notable blog. I'd forgotten how brilliant it was...how inspiring!

I've never had an idol before, but I think I do now.

http://alexthegirl.com

She is brilliant and inspiring and my new idol (she writes!)! Here's some stuff she's done...

February 08th, Love

Being bedridden for the last several days, I've been subjected to too much tv and pitiful women's magazines. I have seen it all, the lies. It never really bothered me before, but it does now.

Valentines day.

Women bitching and moaning how their man doesn't bring them flowers. People saying they won't get married without the big ring. Men asking their women to put on sexy clothing and shake it like a hard martini. Whatever. That's not romance, that's not love, that's just illusion. If you want to build a relationship on that, you're not building a strong foundation.

I'll tell you what love is. Tomorrow I get to see my husband after being away from him for a week. I won't be totally recognisable to him, my face all distorted and swollen with lots of stitches and blackened eyes. I move slowly, with effort, and my speech is very quiet. I won't be able to run up to him when he picks me up, I won't be able to kiss him and hugging him will have to be gently. But I know that he won't mind one bit. To him, I'll be the most beautiful girl. He'll tell me how he missed me, he'll care for me by making me tea and tucking me in at night. I won't feel like an inconvenience or an ugly monster. He'll be patient with me. He'll love me.

That's your romance right there. The other stuff, it's either fluff or icing depending on what you already have. If he doesn't buy you flowers every week or write you love poems by candle light every night, how much does that matter if you know you're unconditionally loved? We need to wake up and redefine romance and get real. Really.

There are more inspiring type things...just read it. Wow...I've never had an idol before...

Subject: Maybe this was my last chance...

oh my god...i can't believe it...i come home right...and then...i see this funny looking envelope in our pile of mail...and i'm so unbelievably drawn to it...so i pick it up right? and it's addressed to me... and there's all these stamps stuck on it...and it's from...the netherlands! i'm feeling around the package going omg omg omg omg omg repeatedly and my stepdad is like what? what? what? and i run to my room and open it and...it's a ring!!!!!!! like the one from the lord of the rings...with elvish carved into it...i can't believe it...i was bugging loop about that ages ago and..he actually got me a ring!!! i can't believe it!!! i feel reeaaallly guilty...but knowing that i have a tiny conscience...i'll get over it and just be really thankful and huggy and all..hehe...he's not online so i can't thank him...omg...

*bounces around*

i gotta do my geography essay teehee...procrastinating...but oh well...

hmm...well that was my event of the day..lol

Subject: The pain I caused it makes me laugh.
Current Mood: Happy
Current Music: Kelly Clarkson - Miss Independant

hmm...interesting conversation with Prashant...now it's got me thinking about 'friends' in general. how would you define a friend? people value different things in friendships...and of course...there is a difference between close friends and best friends right? so what would you consider a friend? a close friend? a best friend? are there big differences between them or subtle ones?

i don't even have a definition! i have lot's of friends all on different levels...different ways our friendships developed etc. all different circumstances too! how can there be a definition for it? hm...i'll look it up on a dictionary...hold on...eeesh can't be bothered :P

so yes...it's all very complicated :P i know the basic levels of friendship i put people on...but the differences...i probably can't define those levels...and what people would consider a friend i might consider an acquaintance or a best friend or...i don't know! it's all very confusing...very personal...very unique and different for everybody...

yes..and that is my thought of the day. i shall sleep now. goodnight!